me: ok i’ll study at 8:00

clock: 8:00

me: *pretends i didn’t see*

(via baracknobama)

stacysdad:

i can relate to pirates because i too am after the booty

(Source: mulderplease, via orgasm)

no-wifi:

why isn’t there a dollar bill eyes emoji?

(via 69shadesofgray)

meladoodle:

try to close someone’s eyes like a corpse when you’re bored of talking to them

(Source: meladoodle, via obamasnovv)